Friday, January 28, 2011

It's Just As Your Mamma Told You...

The traffic in Chennai is getting worse everyday. The past couple of days it took me an hour and a half to come from Mount Road/Anna Salai to Anna Nagar. The number of cars have increased multi-fold. This isn't anything new, but NO ONE OBSERVES THE TRAFFIC RULES! In bumper to bumper traffic today at Nungambakkam High Road the foolish person behind the wheel on the left most side of the road turned on his right indicator and took a deep turn! People honestly need to know where they want to go!

I use the brake more than the accelerator. I think my speedometer showed like 20km/Ph or so. Anyways, while I was stuck in this signal, there stood next to me the ever threatening MTC bus. If there is one thing I'm scared of while driving its the MTC buses. They are the Rajas of the road. I respect them a lot 'cause no way do I want to die in front of one.

So ya, in the aforementioned bus which was spilling with people there stood a row of pakka rowdy type boys behind some pavum girls. Theses guys were singing and playing beats on the roof of the bus and basically making a public menace of themselves.

That's when I saw the look on the girls' faces. FEAR with a capital F.

The guys were standing SO close to the girls. I felt extremely sad that these girls were not able to afford any other kind of transportation and had to undergo this kind of unruly behavior. Women are always targeted. You can wave your women's lib bras saying we're equal to menfolk but it is stupid to ignore the obvious fact staring right at you.

How many times have you been felt up in a crowd or have been on the receiving side of lewd glares? You may be the bravest most smartest woman around but once you've had a bad experience where you've been molested or harassed then your perception on life changes in an instant. I don't mean to say that women have to shut themselves at home and never set foot outside. I am totally for the independence of women financially or otherwise.

But we need to be aware of what lines not to cross. I've seen girls literally throw themselves at guys and make such fools of themselves. There a girls whose first aim while entering a room is to scrounge for good looking guys and make sure that they catch the their attention. They flip their hair, flatter their eyelashes and talk decibels louder just so that everyone knows that she is in the room. There are some people who naturally exude confidence and grace and they attract a different set of eyes but there are a select few who specialize in grabbing eyeballs.

Islam commands women to cover their modesty or hyyah. We are taught how to act and behave in public places. Basically we are taught not to make fools of ourselves. But this, as all things are, is not practiced by every Muslim. In fact Muslim girls are the ones who practice a high degree of immodesty.

Being modest does not mean immediately wearing a burkha, a niqab, covering the face and being anti-social. Modesty is knowing your limits and protecting your hyyah.

There are girls who, Astagfirullah, wear their hijabs in the most provocative way. There are also girls who do not wear hijab but dress so modestly.

It's easy to say "I can do whatever I want but men have to learn to keep their hands off me ". But girlfriend, once you have a bad experience all that goes right out the window.

Basically it's just like your Mamma told you - Better safe than sorry.




2 comments:

Susanna said...

Very true Zarine. But it's also not just about the women. Men should also learn to respect women who know and keep to their limits. That would be an ideal society, but doesn't look like it will happen anytime soon!

Mohammed Siddiq said...

Assalamu Alaikkum ,its a nice article . Really am proud about the Ummah of Rasool Sallalahu alaihi wasallam. Excellent work ,i wish you to succeed in your future too .

Jazakkallah khair .